This post is an extenuation of this Short/Reel video I did for social media. It can be challenging to talk about deep topics in such a short time span so I wanted to elaborate a little more on my comments in this particular case as I believe this is an important topic: https://youtu.be/Bxwdp53lxp4
The word & meaning of 'love', in my mind, is very complex at least initially. This is partly because the worldly definition has little to do with the biblical definition. Many times the worldly version actually means lust or emotions towards an inanimate object. But if we let the Bible define itself, as we should, we see something very different.
But yes, in a simplified answer to the question: Love is all you need - it just may not take the form you expect.
This isn't an exhaustive study as I know much more could be said on the topic. This writing isn't going into the different Greek wordings of Phileo and Agape love that we find in John 21. There is much more good that can be said on this topic than I'm presenting here.
When I read the Bible I see MANY references to love being tied to obedience. I know many people resist the idea of 'submission' as that world has tainted those concepts as well. Many people rather focus on the freedom they have in the Messiah/Christ.
But they may not consider that comes along within the boundaries He has established or following His commands. Many times we don't ask Him His will until after it's too late. I know because I did that and learned the hard way (Hebrews 5:8).
Many people believe Love is euphoric ushy-gushy all-encompassing feeling filled with passion. I'm not saying that Love can't be that - and it should include that (hint: read the Songs or Solomon, a.k.a. The Canticle of Canticles - and if you read between the lines yes it's very filled with physical intimate passion) . . . but Love often times comes after we see the fruits of biblical principles pertaining to love & sacrifice consistently applied as a form of honor & respect towards us as we should do the same as Yeshua/Jesus has done for us.
Worldly love is temporary, self-focused on what you can get out of it, and has us yearning for the 'real' but many spend their lives searching letting their hearts lead the way (Jeremiah 17:9).
Of course, when this comes to being 'in love' with a person there are certain attributes that will make them stand out more to us than others. This is part of being human. But we have to be careful not be led primarily by our emotions or even our wills.
As I'm sure many of us, myself included, have experienced what we thought was love only to find out later that wasn't the case. I've learned that I can't trust myself here and that in this area especially I need His direction. The one who we choose to marry will relationship with Yeshua/Jesus, color our life, affect our future decisions, finances, ministry, and everything else so we can't really afford to get this decision wrong. Maybe this verse applies there although I know there are many variables here to be considered (e.g. unresolved problems from the past, demonic attacks, etc.) so I don't want to over simplify it.
1Jn 2:19 They went out from us, but they were not of us, for if they had been of us, they would have stayed with us – but in order that it might be made manifest that none of them were of us.
If you are in a covenant relationship with somebody that you don't love, I still want to give you hope. While the challenges may seem greater there is still deliverance in Yeshua/Jesus but you'll have to seek Him on the best way to achieve that.
I know this may seem to biblical or spiritual but if you are still single seeking your spouse and young (as many older people have learned these lessons the hard way - although there are many older people that haven't learned this lesson) I strongly suggest that you heed this advice.
But really this is the bottom line as I see it. Love is a choice. It's about sacrifice/obedience which then brings fulfillment in our lives.
You'll find some verses below to consider when you are looking to see what the Bible has to say about love. It's not a complete list and there is some cross-over but you'll get the basic idea . . .
Love as obedience/sacrifice
Gen 22:2 And He said, “Take your son, now, your only son Yitsḥaq/Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriyah/Moriah, and offer him there as an ascending offering on one of the mountains which I command you.”
Exo 20:6 but showing loving-commitment to thousands, to those who love Me and guard My commands.
Deu 6:5 “And you shall love יהוה your Elohim with all your heart, and with all your being, and with all your might.
Deu 6:6 “And these Words which I am commanding you today shall be in your heart
Jos 22:5 “Only, diligently guard to do the command and the Torah which Mosheh/Moses the servant of יהוה commanded you, to love יהוה your Elohim, and to walk in all His ways, and to guard His commands, and to cling to Him, and to serve Him with all your heart and with all your being.”
Mat 5:44 “But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those cursing you, do good to those hating you, and pray for those insulting you and persecuting you,
Joh 3:16 “For Elohim so loved the world that He gave His only brought-forth Son, so that everyone who believes in Him should not perish but possess everlasting life.
Joh 13:34 “A renewed command I give to you, that you love one another, as I have loved you, that you also love one another.
Joh 13:35 “By this shall all know that you are My taught ones, if you have love for one another.”
Joh 14:15 “If you love Me, you shall guard My commands.
Joh 14:21 “He who possesses My commands and guards them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me shall be loved by My Father, and I shall love him and manifest Myself to him.”
Joh 14:31 but, in order for the world to know that I love the Father, and that as the Father commanded Me, so I am doing. Rise up, let us go from here.
Joh 15:12 “This is My command, that you love one another, as I have loved you.
Joh 15:13 “No one has greater love than this: that one should lay down his life for his friends.
Joh 15:14 “You are My friends if you do whatever I command you.
Rom 12:9 Let love be without hypocrisy. Shrink from what is wicked, cling to what is good.
Rom 12:10 In brotherly love, tenderly loving towards one another, in appreciation, giving preference to each other;
Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, as Messiah also did love the assembly and gave Himself for it
1Jn 3:11 Because this is the message that you heard from the beginning, that we should love one another, …
1Jn 3:16 By this we have known love, because He laid down His life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.
1Jn 3:17 But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his tender affections from him, how does the love of Elohim stay in him?
1Jn 3:18 My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
1Jn 4:9 By this the love of Elohim was manifested in us, that Elohim has sent His only brought-forth Son into the world, in order that we might live through Him.
1Jn 4:10 In this is love, not that we loved Elohim, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be an atoning offering for our sins.
1Jn 4:11 Beloved ones, if Elohim so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
1Jn 5:2 By this we know that we love the children of Elohim, when we love Elohim and guard His commands.
1Jn 5:3 For this is the love for Elohim, that we guard His commands, and His commands are not heavy,
2Jn 1:6 And this is the love, that we walk according to His commands. This is the command, that as you have heard from the beginning, you should walk in it.
Love as a feeling/emotion
Deu 6:5 “And you shall love יהוה your Elohim with all your heart, and with all your being, and with all your might.
1Co 13:1 If I speak with the tongues of men and of messengers, but do not have love, I have become as sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.
1Co 13:2 And if I have prophecy, and know all secrets and all knowledge, and if I have all belief, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am none at all.
1Co 13:3 And if I give out all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I give my body to be burned, but do not have love, I am not profited at all.
1Co 13:4 Love is patient, is kind, love does not envy, love does not boast, is not puffed up,
1Co 13:5 does not behave indecently, does not seek its own, is not provoked, reckons not the evil,
1Co 13:6 does not rejoice over the unrighteousness, but rejoices in the truth,
1Co 13:7 it covers all, believes all, expects all, endures all.
1Co 13:8 Love never fails . . .
Mat 22:36 “Teacher, which is the great command in the Torah?”
Mat 22:37 And יהושע said to him, “ ‘You shall love יהוה your Elohim with all your heart, and with all your being, and with all your mind.’ (Deu 6:5).
Mat 22:38 “This is the first and great command.
Mat 22:39 “And the second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ (Lev 19:18)
Mat 22:40 “On these two commands hang all the Torah and the Prophets.”
1Jn 4:8 The one who does not love does not know Elohim, for Elohim is love.
I pray this helps you wherever you are at in your 'walk' with Him. He does love you and wants to fulfill all of your dreams and desires but it's better when we let His will be our will and do it His way.
He needs strong marriages especially during this time to demonstrate to the world the benefits of biblical marriages & other relationships.
- Noe